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Friday, September 9, 2011, was deemed Ace Prom by the Demisexuality Tumblr. (I should clarify that here “Ace” stands for asexual; it’s a very common abbreviation within the community.) The invitation was issued on August 8th, although I didn’t find out about it until just a couple days ago.

Ace flag

The reason that I became aware of Ace Prom was through a link from Asexual News to their article featuring it, and the controversy it was bringing up within the GLBT community. The wording of the event’s name apparently made some in the larger community feel that the asexual were trying to appropriate the GLBT proms that have become so popular recently. Fortunately, it was mostly a tempest in a teapot, and things went on.

Ace Prom was an all day event.  The Tumblr invite gave some suggestions on how to hold your own Prom:

What: Ace Prom!
Friday September 9th, 2011. All day. Log in when you want/can and log out when you want/can. And if you can’t make it at all, you can still post things related to ace prom when you get a chance if you’d like.
Tumblr, and wherever you physically blog from. You could even go some place you like (that you normally don’t blog from) to make it more fun.
Anyone who is part of the asexual spectrum is invited. Anyone who is questioning whether or not they may be asexual are welcome. Allies and anyone who is ace-positive are welcome.
What To Bring: 
What Not To Bring: 
The Privilege Olympics are banned from ace prom. Anyone attempting to start such things should be ignored, as in DO NOT RESPOND TO THEM OR REBLOG AND TRY TO ARGUE. This is supposed to be fun, not triggering, frustrating and shitty.
What To Wear: 
Whatever you want. You can dress up or not bother with making your outfit anything special. You might want to wear any ace pride things if you own any (t-shirts, buttons, asexual flag coloured clothes). It’s entirely up to you. But please be clothed if you are going to post a video or photo of yourself, as, well “ace prom” is kind of self-explanatory and some aces are repulsed and would not like to see that on their dashboard.
Who To Go With: 
You can attend by yourself if you want. Or you could ask someone, or more than one person, go in a group. Whatever you want. It’s just like any other tumblr prom where you can message someone and ask if they want to go with you (or use another form of communication if you want to get creative, like asking in a video, making a GIF…I don’t know. I’m bad with these sort of things). And then I guess you just say you’re going to prom together. I don’t know. I went to tumblr prom (May 25th 2011) alone so I’m not sure how it works, but I’m guessing it’s how I just described it.

And I shouldn’t have to say this but just in case: The person(s) you ask doesn’t/don’t have to be part of the asexual spectrum. If you want to ask a sexual, that’s perfectly okay.


Here’s how it goes

  1. Log on to tumblr any time on September 9th.
  2. Post a photo of yourself in your prom outfit or a video of yourself (optional, of course)
  3. Tag any related posts “ace prom” so everyone attending can find it
  4. Post anything ace-positive, ace-pride, etc
  5. You might want to play some asexuality spectrum-friendly music, or maybe just your favourite music
  6. You might also want to bake a cake, or buy one. Or something else if you’re not into cake.
  7. Maybe watch your favourite ace-friendly movie
  8. Or read a good book
  9. You know, whatever you want, really
  10. Posts photos or videos or drawings of what you’re doing to participate in ace prom. It’s not really an event if we’re all doing it in secret, especially from each other. But again, I know some people aren’t comfortable posting photos or videos so this isn’t mandatory.

I thought that this sounded like a lot of fun. As I’m aromantic, I didn’t really want to “take” anybody to the prom, so I ended up taking myself to the Ace Prom as my date.  How I did this was to dress up in semi-formal masculine attire and have my picture taken. Then, for my date, I dressed up in a skirt, lace top, and makeup and was again had my picture taken. Then I posted the pictures of me and my “date” side-by-side each other on my tumblr page.

It was great fun, and I got compliments on both pictures.

Today, the moderator of Demisexuality who had come up with the idea agreed with the general population of attendees, in that it was a lot of fun. We were encouraged that if something had prevented us from celebrating on September 9th, we could definitely keep up the party.

I foresee cake in my future today.   🙂

~*~ Gretchen