It’s Okay to be Child-Free!

One thing that has always bothered the hell out of me is that everyone, society, assumes that because I’m a woman that I like kids. Love them. Want them. Want them around me. Oh, hell, you couldn’t be more wrong.I run in the opposite direction of children. They just irritate me and they are ill-mannered, as well as having no concept of boundaries.

People assume that, “Oh, my kid is screaming and crying? Aww, how cute?!” Nope, not in the least. If you’re not going to do something to get your kid to knock it off, or at least take it outside, I’ll give the little brat something to cry about. And yes, the dirty looks you’re getting from me are deserved because you’re being rude and inconsiderate thinking that your kid is cute in their little fit.

People don’t know how to discipline their kids anymore and if I ever did things that these kids do now? I’d know enough not to do it again. I’m not the only one. Anyone over the age of 25 knows that too. Our parents didn’t put up with that crap. Now kids walk all over their parents and parents don’t have any reign of power at all. Things need to change.

And just because I’m a young woman doesn’t mean that I want children. I have been asked my whole life, “how many kids do you want?” When I was in the relationship with my ex (which was almost a nine year relationship), we were constantly asked when we were going to have kids. Luckily, both of us were adamantly child-free, so it wasn’t an issue that we were divided over, and on the off, minute, chance that I did get pregnant, we knew what our option was going to be.

It needs to stop being a standardized question for young women. We are not reproductive robots; we are SO much more. There’s more to us and more that we have to offer – that’s what we should be asked questions about, about the things that we’re doing. Ask me questions about what I’m getting done with this magazine, ask me what I’m getting done with my editing, ask me what I’m getting done with the writing that I’ve been working on, if I’m actually going to get that second book of poetry published. Ask me those questions!

Don’t ask me if I’m going to pop out a little kid that I know I can’t care for and I would never put through the experience of being adopted. Don’t assume. Sure, there are some twentysomethings out there who want nothing more than to be a mother, that’s all they’ve ever dreamed of since they were little. Ever. But not me. Playing with dolls wasn’t my thing. I was out playing with the dogs and getting dirty, out riding horses with my mother.

But don’t get me wrong – there’s nothing wrong with a woman who wants nothing more than to be a mother. It’s probably one of, if not the, hardest job(s) out there. It’s just not for me. I know it’s certainly not for me. I have friends who have kids and I’m nothing but happy for them. We have come to an understanding that being a mother or father is good for them and me not being a parent is what’s best for me. Some people embrace it, some people don’t. I just can’t, it truly just isn’t for me.

~*~ Greenlee

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